Finding my voice

The margins are the most important part of any returned paper. After dozens of hard-fought days of putting off a paper, and a couple of wee-morning hours of actual writing; it is critical to examine the margins. Professor Thomas is infamous for her margin scribbles. They mirror her speaking cadence and rhythm perfectly.

Once she wrote a positive comment to let me know that I had found my "authentic voice." It is one of the most coveted red-pen markings her students look for; and I found it on my paper. Just once, though.

I have been preaching recently, and in writing and orating sermons I have tried to find my authentic voice in the sermons I preach. I can't help but realize that my "authentic voice" is a rich amalgamate of the voices who declared the Good News to me over my lifetime.

My sermons are timed by Pastor Rod Smith's watch. He was my childhood pastor, and to my recollection - his sermons never exceeded 15 minutes. They were rich and insightful. They connected the people and God. And they were short.

Rev. Lori Blocker taught me how to speak with vulnerability. Lori once shared a story with our congregation. She spoke of the great loneliness she felt to be sleeping alone - she described the ache and pain of celibacy beautifully - and then she described the sensation of literally feeling Jesus surround her with His arms and hold her. This story didn't sit well with the high-hair types and those with make-up to hide the bruises. The congregation hated it. The complained about it for weeks. I LOVED it. It was the most real thing that had happened in our church in ages and it opened a flood gate (it was only a little while later that a woman spoke of her families struggle with alcoholism - inspired, I believe, by Lori's vulnerable sermon) that brought renewal to our church.

Rev Bill Beatty taught me to always speak the truth. He apologizes publicly for sins committed publicly. He stops mid-sermon to correct any untruth he might have spoken. His sermons are interactive and accessible. They connect on many different levels and with all of the senses.

Pastor Craig taught me to preach the old time religion - and to let people know that the altar is always open. Pastor David and Pastor Charles gave me my cadence and rhythm. Dr Larsen and Dr Ken taught me to find where my congregation is and to work from there - but to not be afraid to challenge them.

Andy and Tom taught me to feel the beat and groove to the music while speaking. Darlene taught me to make a point and drive it home - to love the people enough to speak the truth in a non-judgmental voice.

I continue on the journey to find my "authentic voice." I feel that the journey is wonderful and illuminating.