Barneyisfat

There’s this great scene in Family Guy. Baby Stewie marries Olivia, a child actress. They live in a cardboard home and have pasta spaghetti for dinner. Olivia asks Stewie how his day went and he replies, “Well, it was a long one. First I was an astronaut, then I was a cowboy, and then I was a fireman.” It’s a great montage of children pretending to live in a grown up world. At one point, a few days after the wedding, they have a conversation.

Stewie: We are in a sexless relationship. We have yet to have sex.
Olivia: Do you even know what sex is?
Stewie: Of course I do … is it some kind of cake? That’s beside the point.

As I think more and more about God’s relationship with humans, I just can’t help think that we’ve understood something terribly wrong. That at this point in our theology we have achieved little more than a disconnect. Stewie doesn’t know what sex is, but he knows he isn’t getting any. Maybe we have no concept of love. Maybe we have no concept of grace.

I realize more and more that my theology is too small. My theology is just large enough for my current life situation. My theology isn’t big enough for the Holocaust. My theology isn’t big enough for the crack whore’s crack addicted baby. My theology isn’t big enough for the bulimic, lesbian middle schooler trying desperately to fit in at youth group. My theology is simply too small.

But, as I look to Jesus I realize that somehow His theology is big enough. His understanding of God and how God interacts with us is big enough. Jesus held to a theology that was big enough for tax collectors, whores, rapists, murderers, gossipers, and lying 12 year olds.

The Bible says that God’s grace is sufficient. And I have to believe that. I have to believe that when nothing makes sense, that God’s grace is sufficient. I have to believe that whether God “has everything planned out” or whether God “doesn’t know if I’ll choose Subway or McDonalds” that God’s grace is still sufficient. I have to believe that my understanding of God and humankind’s interaction with God doesn’t change God.

That my inability to understand love or grace or forgiveness doesn’t hinder God’s ability to love or show grace or forgive.

That when my understanding of God amounts to little more than a total disconnect that God’s grace is still sufficient.

God, I just don’t understand. I don’t understand how you created me or how you still manage to love me. Your grace is sufficient, your love is tremendous, your forgiveness undeniable. May my simple life help one person understand your nature just a little bit better than I can.