Dating Sermon

First I want you to know that I'm probably not the person to be up here. I have very little experience with dating - and, since I'm single and not married, you can probably figure out that all of my past dating relationships have ended and some of them ended badly. So take my portion of this sermon with a grain of salt.

When we pick a topic we like to open our bible and look for biblical examples. But, with this particular topic, that's a little difficult. Our concept of dating doesn't really line up with the Bible in any significant way.

Adam and Eve was the match made in heaven. Literally. But who did their sons marry? Really? We could go through the list of Old Testament heroes ... but we won't find much dating advice. A few fell in love - but the usual outcome was that the man had to work for the woman's father for seven years to earn enough for the dowry payments.

In Biblical times marriages were arranged affairs. Parents, relatives, and villages arranged marriages. Usually there was a financial reason - rarely was love ever brought into the equation. And while I'm sure that many of your parents would love it if this was still the case, we live in a different world and a different culture. Jesus didn't ride in automobiles - but that doesn't mean that we should avoid them.

We must take a step back and look for larger themes to see what the Bible teaches us about dating.

Jesus spoke about love all the time. Specifically, Jesus calls us to sacrificial love - to living with love that serves others and hopes for good. Paul uses the love of Jesus Christ as the example for our married lives - that we should love our spouse so much that we would be willing to die for him or her. That wives should serve their husbands like Christ served the world and that husbands should love their wives like Christ loved the world.


It's interesting that there is so little discussion on this subject. While dating and romantic relationships are a huge part of our lives - the scriptures are fairly quiet on the issue. We don't find chapter after chapter of teaching on this subject. Jesus doesn't say, "And if he tries to kiss you on the second date you should break up with him." Jesus doesn't say, "You should buy her jewelry to show that you're interested." Our understanding of dating and relationships are primarily culture. The tension is primarily between what we have been taught, what we believe, and the traditions of our country vs. Hollywood.

Hollywood would like us to believe that every couple hops into bed on the first date - and this simply isn't true. We don't run after our significant other and catch her before she gets on the plane. The first kiss isn't perfect.

Hollywood and Ukrainian culture both agree on one thing - if you aren't in a relationship you are basically worthless. A Hollywood actress who is 25 and single should start adopting cats and suffer her single life for eternity - and here in Ukraine it seems that things are worse.

Within minutes of meeting people they ask if I am married. When they find out that I'm not married and not dating - they immediately begin throwing women at me. I know this isn't just because I'm an American. I know that there is a ton of social pressure in this culture to get married.

I'm of the opinion that you should give yourself a little slack. You should have fun and enjoy dates. You should put up boundaries and discuss them with people you are dating because you are worth waiting for. Take things slow and enjoy the ride. Listen to the opinions of your parents - but feel free to let them know that you aren't in any rush and that you're really happy at just the spot you're at.

But, if you're still feeling that pressure - we want to give you some tips, advice, and guidance on how to take the next steps. So ... we're going to play a little game.

Welcome to the dating game.

ласкаво просимо на -гра у побачення!-

[ At this point, I will become the announcer for a fun, new dating game show. Shannon will be the female contestant and David (along with two of our most handsome students) will be a male contestant. The whole thing will be done in Ukrainian - which is a big step for all of us. We're all nervous. But it should be good. During the game David will preach twice on topics of dating and we will end with Shannon closing the sermon. ]