Wednesday, November 01, 2006

It was during the summer before my freshman year in high school that I, at church camp, went to my counselor and confessed that I "struggled" with masturbation. I knew that I was the only boy on the face of the earth who masturbated almost daily. Once I had even done it 6 times in a day. I had a serious problem and needed to confess.

Now that I'm older (and old enough to do a Wikipedia search on masturbation without giggling and turning red) I realize that I was not alone. Ever. I've started talking with people honestly about masturbation. One kid did it 12 times in one day. Wikipedia says that more than half of all guys masturbate daily. I was normal - so incredibly normal.

I admitted my "sin" to the guys I was staying with that week. They all supported me and showed me a lot of love - but I still felt so alone. I was the only one in that room man enough to admit my "sin." Probably half of the guys there struggled much more than I did. None would admit it. I lasted 3 months before I masturbated again. I was so ashamed that day. I thought that I had failed God and could never be taken back.

I was so wrong then. God took me back (I hope no one is shocked) and continues to love me. I realize how incredibly normal I am. I realize how incredibly often God takes all of us back.

I think that the church needs to be more honest and to openly address the issue of masturbation. I am going to let my children know that it is completely normal (and healthy, maybe.)

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