Being a Man

Today at the church dinner Ms. Cheek the vice-principal of the elementary school where I work asked for men to be mentors to the children at her school. She brought up one of the men that has been a mentor for 3 years. It takes half an hour a week to be a mentor. Jerry told about the boy he has been mentoring - in first grade you want lots of green strips and the boy he was mentoring didn't have any. Jerry promised the boy a fishing trip if he got all green strips. In a few short weeks all of his strips were green and Jerry took him fishing. I work at the school and there is a significant number of at risk kids. I am a father figure - I might be the only man that has ever played on a playground with them or has ever read to them.
Ms. Cheek concluded with, "We need men. I need men to be mentor's to these boys. These boys need a father figure - a man who doesn't come home and yell at them and beat them and then go out and do drugs. Will you mentor a child?" I tear up just re-reading this line. Guys from my church went forward and signed on to mentor a child. A whole mess'a methodists mentoring chil'en. Jerry (and the other men who are going to mentor these at risk kids) is a man. A true man.

In Forrest Dorm every Wednesday night they have a video Bible Study titled Authentic Manhood. Today they learned how to heal your wounds if you father was distant or if you love your mother or if you were lonely. A bunch of guys go every Wednesday night to learn how to be men. They get together and feel manly. A few of my friends recommended highly that I attend. (Translation: I'm not manly enough.) I asked these friends if they would mentor a kid at my school. None agreed. I can't throw a football or shoot a hoop if my life depended on it (I had a distant father) I might really enjoy cooking and baking (I love my mother) and I might get anxious when I'm around a bunch of guys acting like fool headed jerks to prove their manliness (I was a pretty lonely kid).

But, I am a father figure. I love who I am and respect myself. I am a man of God - some men of God don't know how to tie all of the boy-scout knots. Some men of God really enjoy Jane Austen novels. I can't help but think that in the grand scheme of things it is a much manlier thing to mentor a kid with an abusive or absent father than it is to gather and listen to a video explain why I need to give fewer hugs. There's something very manly in the notion that I might be the only father figure one of those kids ever has. I'm proud to be the manly man who happens to bake cheesecake that God made me to be.